Stop every little thing that you’re doing–life altering updates are IN:
1. Survey results: pilot/pilot hanky panky in the cockpit–8,353 people voted yes (the equivalent of a small town); pilot/pilot sleeping or engaged in deep conversation: 2 people voted yes (Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar– they don’t believe in cockpit hanky panky).
2. Little fart in a wind storm. Did you know if you Google this favorite phrase of Joyce’s it comes up 33,000 times and is used to refer to everything from Iraq to China to the Clinton years. Who knew Joyce was so Google-icious?
3. ChazJoyce (a Hugh Jackman look-alike) got back to us about the bars. Here is what he reported: “I have to keep my desk locked these days. Once the bell rings at 2:20, Mar-joyce is swimming upstream past the kids leaving school, trying to reach my room for one of her ‘bars.’ After 7 of them, I try to remind her that she’s struggling to squeeze through my doorway, but that seems to have little-to-no effect on her. I don’t know what else to do. She’s eating me out of house and home and bars. I can only refill the supply so often and so quickly. And she’s dressing as an airline pilot for Halloween.’ (It’s that time of year when Joyce likes to observe and celebrate bar time. It’s the Halloweenie thing to do. According to J, there is nothing like the Snickers snack size. However, we are partial to the Reese’s Cup. What’s your favorite?)
4. We’ve come up with a way to earn some extra cash. We’re going to set up a little snack cart in the pediatrician’s parking lot. We’ll sell juice boxes, bars, sour gummy worms, Corona Lights, Slim Jims, and hot dogs. Are we the only ones who see a huge profit margin in this business? Can’t you see it . . . all those parents waiting in their cars with their little sick naughties . . . desperate . . . for . . . something . . . to take the pain away. Spike is very pleased with our ingenuity and is financially backing the entire project.
5. Bulldog is feeling a little better. The naughty sparkle has returned to his eye and he is sitting up straight again. Due to his illness, Mama had to miss a girlfriend field trip and girlfriend night out. Boo hoo hoo. Poor Mama. Thank God for movies or we’d be climbing the walls. We escaped to Australia with Nicky Kidman (we’re beginning to detect some ‘cat’ in her face). And we enjoyed the glistening and toned body of Hugh Jackman . . . . . .
(Thank you, Hugh, that was very nice.) Then we were off to Nim’s Island with Jodie Foster. We wore our travel scarf the entire time and Bulldog lined up all his stuffed animal friends to watch with us. Who needs a theater when you have a big bed and a bigger bowl of popcorn?
Happy Halloweenie to all Joycerinos!